You probably can't come within a mile of a mid-life crisis without hearing that you should be 'finding your passions'. Like much self-help pop psychology this is more broad concept than specific solution. What is it that really lights your fire? Gee, how could you have got this far in life without knowing this?

That emotive word, 'passion' makes you feel somehow deficient for not having, or at least not being able to articulate, something apparently so vital to your well being. It's terribly dramatic, being asked what your passions are, don't you think? What pressure! It seems apt for those of us who are typically boisterous, exuberant, excitable people. But we aren't all like that. 'Passion' probably looks different for different personalities.

And perhaps it is more like your favourite dress. The one about which you say 'I love this dress'. Not 'love' as in the trembling knees, palpitating heart, couldn't-possibly-live-without-it sense, you just mean that you really like it, and feel good in it. That's what we want to find. Something we feel happy doing, something that connects to our authentic selves.

So if you have been searching for your 'life purpose', your 'passions' to no avail, maybe you should give yourself a break. Maybe it's those grandiose terms that are misleading and just a little scary. Let's give it another label. Ken Robinson has a better suggestion. (Yes, I know I have written about Ken before, but he makes a lot of sense!) His counsel is to 'find your element'... now that seems much more approachable, doesn't it?